1 Corinthians 2:4-5

1 Corinthians 2: 4 and my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of mans wisdom, but in the demonstration of the Sprite and of power

1 Corinthians 2: 5 that your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God

When I think back on “my down” time in Christ this statement or verse had no meaning to me and the idea of an active spirit or power was not for me but for those who could afford church or even be one of those who grew up in a Christian family. You know the ones three or four generations of ministers, minister dads, priest brothers. Then in 2008 I got baptized in the Holy Ghost while at a revival in Albany Oregon. That time seams to be a focal point of my “repentance”. Also this is the time I went thru my changes in thinking and growth. I was reading a book “When Heaven Invades Earth” written by SR. Pastor Bill Johnson of Redding Calif. The Statement was made “how much are you willing to live in the spirit”. I had been struggling with my prayer language, the use of it and why or did I need it at all. I was fighting self at this point and losing badly or was it winning? Anyway I decided to quite smoking and started praying on it .. I announced to my wife that I was and come pray with me. I started my prayer and it sounded real good to me said amen … but my wife was not quite done she was praying in the spirit, and after a moment I tried to pull my hands away and she gripped me and prayed louder. I don’t know but some sort of angsigity came over me and I pulled away got mad and was crying. Scared the something out of me it did. I felt emeditat remorse for my actions and started crying, and whispering to myself “I'm not gonna get it, I'm never gonna get it”. I was so sorrowful about it took me a few days to pull Thur. But God decided that he was not going to let me off the hook that easy. I kept praying and decided that I not a coward and I could live in the spirit and faith. So I rededicated my live to God and Jesus thru prayer and told them both I was not going to back away again. And guess what? My prayer language has come about in powerful ways. So I stepped out in Faith. The change in me is beautiful and awful at the same time. I have last weight and truly have no stress in my life, I give no authority to the evil one to allow stress in my life. I feel much happier and see God in most everything I do and am making strives to achieve 100%. The sorrow is in the failures in my life, which has given me a powerful testimony. But no peace in my heart will be fully achievable until my whole family is in love with each of its parts, starting with the self and moving out. Learning to love, love , love.

More to come on this. Sleepy now.